My Testimony

I guess my life is an example of someone who was blessed by God their whole life yet rejected/ignored all that He seemed to have given/said to me. My mother is the perfect example of a godly woman, my father the perfect example of a godly man. Because of the parents God had given me, I know what I need to be as a man, and I know what I need to love in a woman. He placed me in a Christian environment in every state, in my home, my education, and my church. I constantly was having the truth shoved in my face. But I would always spit it back in His face. I threw all His blessings away, the talents that He gave me. I didn't seem to be getting the approval, or at least in my childish eyes, the love of my parents so I looked for it in popularity. I began to attend a youth group that seemed to draw the popular crowd. Most of the kids who attended were hypocrites like myself, only there to hangout because our parents would let us go there on a Wednesday night. I learned from these hypocritical friends and the non-believing friends that I had, that you were cool based on how many girls you could get to "love" you every other weekend. That watching pornography, listening to the dirtiest music, and shoplifting were ways to fit in with the popular kids and to get kids to hangout with you. By the grace of God, I had a heart change. Sadly it took the fear of everyone I loved finding out what I had been doing to change my heart, but then again, my heart was so hardened by that point that I had to go through such pain to finally break down. By the grace of God my heart was changed before things got too late. I kept my virginity, I didn't spend any years in prison and I came to the realization of all the lies that Satan had put in my mind. My parents did love me and that the lusts of the flesh will quickly leave us in the gutter alone to die. As a child my father always would recite Psalm 1, to this day I know it, but however, I never realized the truth in that whatever he that brings forth good fruit does shall prosper, "but the ungodly are not so: but they are like the chaff which the wind drives away." Psalm 1:4. Yet Christ plucked me out of the gutter, the dusted me off, and gave me a new start. I would have to say that I have truly been living for Christ for about 3 years now. Now, having a change of heart, I view everything differently. I think the new worldview He has given me is what will keep me living all out for Him. There is no desire to go back to who I used to be any longer. I'm sick of my own hypocrisy, it annoys me to think of the things that I would do right before and right after Church. However, "If any man be in Christ, he is a new creation: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new." 2 Corinthians 5:17. I thank God everyday for the new mindset He has given me. When I allowed to Satan to get in my heart, I saw life the way that he wanted me to see it, my actions and my thoughts were set to his desires. However the same worked with Christ, when He changed my heart, Everything outward changed as well. Then, God did something in my life that caught me completely off guard. After my heart had changed and I had finally felt at peace with God and with my parents and with everything; my life felt perfect. Then God took away, what was in my eyes, the greatest thing that He had given me. A solid relationship with a godly woman. I became angry, not at God but at her and then eventually, myself. The devil used this opportunity to try and break me down from the inside out. Yet I felt God tell me that this needed to happen so that I could give 100% to Him at Potter'sfield this year without any distractions. However during my time here, I can see that Satan is trying to use what He can to get my focus off of God. However, God is continually providing for me with the examples I need that will continue to encourage my heart on my journey, during this year and during this program.

Proverbs 21:21- "He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity and honor." Proverbs 20:7- "The righteous man leads a blameless life; blessed are his children after Him."